The Discovery

I remember one particular evening that I spent in Skurdu last year. We were all sitting by the lake, my old friends and some new ones I had made; and we were doing the usual; chatting, singing, laughing..Actually they were doing the usual; I was doing what I had been doing for the last three days; sitting quietly staring at the lake, the grey skies, the majestic mountains and my old friend, the moon. We all are very fond of singing and sang nonstop throughout the trip. It was unbelievable the number of times I was asked to sing during that week. I was running out of songs by the end of the third evening. Ghalib had been done to death, old songs by Lata, Kishore, Mukesh, Rafi, Haimant Kumar, you name it. My very close friend Hal would keep asking for this one song every two hours and everytime she felt I was making excuses to get out of it, she would say 'wo sunao, wo dil se qareeb, dil ko choo lenay wala'; I had to give in every time. What a drama queen and how I miss her. We were all there for different reasons; some for the thrill of it, some for a holiday but one, to clear her head, to get away from it all. Wasn't very successful at doing so though... We drove from Islamabad all the way to 'Challas' where it was unbelievably hot; stayed the night there and went off the next morning to Skurdu; crossing 'Babusar' on our way which was no mean feat. Skurdu was every bit as beautiful as promised by my friends and the few days that I stayed there, I did have some very peaceful moments too. But the beauty and serenity brought a certain sadness with it or was it just me? It was there that I realized that I have reached a stage in my life where I only want to do things that mean something to me. I only want to spend time with those who really matter to me; I only want to read things that I'm truly interested in, I will only paint when I really feel like... Photographs have to speak to me, music has to tug the strings of my heart, silence has to be more meaningful than words. It was there that I truly discovered the need to try to find myself, not caring about how the world judges me. It was there that I discovered what serenity really is; how soothing it is when you are surrounded by silence. It was there that I woke up from my deep slumber, looked around and found everything so refreshingly beautiful; the lake, the mountains, the apple trees, the lively chatter of my dear friends.. Skurdu..the place I long to return to with a dear one, just taking a stroll along the lake, with unsaid words filling the silence..Skurdu, where the desire to be myself became stronger.. Skurdu, so beautiful, still waiting with open arms, welcoming anyone who needs solace... Skurdu...